Uninvited
by gwenn0
Summary: Dark fic - this one was supposed to be a funny piece about Simon discovering that River was having a baby, but it ended up as a disturbing piece about Simon discovering that River was losing a baby. Rayne, but not in a happy way.


_Title:_ Uninvited

_Date:_ September 21st, 2008

_Word Count:_ 1,780

_Summary: _River doesn't want anything with Jayne. Jayne doesn't want anything with River. Jayne and River don't want anything together. And a baby would be Jayne and River together.

_A Copper for a Kiss_ September Challenge: baby!fic / kid!fic

_Rated:_ PG13

_Warnings:_ Dark fic - this one was supposed to be a funny piece about Simon discovering that River was having a baby, but it ended up as a disturbing piece about Simon discovering that River was losing a baby. Post-Rayne.

_Disclaimer:_ I own nothing or no one. If Jayne insists in stalking me, you should talk to him, not to me.

_A/N:_ English is not my native language, so feel free to point at anything weird you find.

Yep, kid!fic/baby!fic is definitely not my happy place…

--o--

Simon stared at his mei-mei sleeping on the infirmary bed. Staring was pretty much the only thing he could do as he tried to calm himself down from the day's events. His brain raced with a thousand thoughts and scenarios as he tried to wrap his mind around what had happened to River. His sweet and special mei-mei who had already suffered so much. The biggest joy of his life, the one he had given up everything for. His darling little genius who always knew better, who was always right, who always got what she wanted. His mei-mei. River. Who had just had a miscarriage. He and River had been alone in the ship for the whole day, as the rest of the crew made their usual run for supplies in Persephone. It had been around lunch time when River entered the infirmary crying, and Simon had been utterly shocked to see blood running down her thighs as she clutched her hands tightly around her belly, showing clear signs of a miscarriage. As if it wasn't hard enough for Simon to embrace that concept, he also had to work with the ideas that he _hadn't noticed_ that River had been pregnant, and that the baby had had a _father_. A big-bad-mean-ape-thing-gone-wrong father. Simon sighed and closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. Oh, he could feel a gigantic headache coming.

Once her body relaxed and she was feeling slightly better, River had been quick and surprisingly clear in explaining that it hadn't been Jayne's fault; she had, in fact, been adamant in assuring Simon that Jayne didn't even know it had happened, being too drunk that night to remember who he had slept with – but not drunk enough not to be able to… _perform_, apparently. River said she had made a mistake – a miscalculation of the variables, in her words – and Simon was still disturbed by the serenity in her voice as she explained to him how she had seduced Jayne in his own bunk after he arrived sloppy drunk from a night in town. She had let her curiosity and her hormones get the best of her, and Simon had to remind himself that, even though she was a psychic killer genius, she was still just a kid – and a naïve one – in so many aspects, due to her lack of practical experience. She felt everything she wasn't supposed to, and she had acted on those feelings. She had felt attracted to Jayne – _Jayne_ of all people – and had taken her opportunity when he was too drunk to oppose, his inebriated mind probably having a hard time to register anything beyond _female, warm and willing_. The idea of River taking advantage of Jayne would have been hilarious if it wasn't so real and so serious right now.

Even though Simon despised the mercenary, he could understand or, at least, try to find reason in a logical level to why River would feel attracted. Jayne might not be the smartest in the pack, but he was definitely a strong and virile alpha-male. River had probably acted on pure instinct when she cornered Jayne. And knowing his sister, once she had made up her mind, Jayne wouldn't have stood a chance not even if he was sober and alert. Simon sighed again as he ran a hand through his hair. Fact was, it was done. His mei-mei had just lost the mercenary's baby, and Simon was having a hard time figuring out how he felt about it. On one hand, it was for the best. A baby, even being born from a drunken one-night-stand, would mean a permanent connection between River and Jayne, and Simon was sure it would be for the best interest of the 'verse if that never happen. Jayne was definitely not what Simon would call a father material. He was crude, selfish, violent, ignorant, stupid, mean, inconsiderate… The list could go on and on. The man was a brutal cold-blooded killer, who only cared about money and guns, and only had time for alcohol and whores. And River… Even though she had been getting better, he knew River still had to walk a long way in the recovery road; she still had a lot to come to terms with before finding herself ready to be a mother.

On the other hand, every life was a bless in his eyes, and nothing was more sacred for the doctor – that extremely high respect for any form of life was what made Simon want to be a doctor in first place. Simon's heart grieved for the loss of a little life that would never have a chance to see the light. River had been an exceptionally cute baby, and Simon couldn't help but wonder about what that baby would have looked like. Pinky healthy cheeks, chocolate curls and vivid brown eyes like River's when she was a baby? No, Jayne probably had strong genes, there would have something of his in that baby. Maybe his strong squared jaw would look good in the baby, especially if it was a boy. And Jayne's eyes. River used to complain about not having blue eyes like Simon's when they were kids, and Jayne's eyes were even bluer than the doctor's. Yes, chocolate curls and blue eyes sounded about right for River's baby. Simon swallowed the sudden lump in his throat, and his heart sank a little further for his sister. That baby wasn't real now, and maybe would never be.

Simon was brought back from his reveries by River's body stirring on the bed. She opened her eyes and slowly took in her surroundings. Simon shook away all of his conflicted feelings and put on his professional face for his sister.

"Hey there, mei-mei. How are you feeling?"

River blinked as she focused her eyes on him.

"Sleepy."

Simon nodded.

"Do you remember what happened?" He asked quietly and waited nervously for her answer.

"Yes. The pregnancy is over."

Her tone was flat and calm, without any of the obvious emotions he had expected, and Simon blinked in surprise. He had treated women who had suffered miscarriages before, and it was never this easy for them to talk about it. Never. Simon wondered why she wasn't upset. Maybe she had seen it coming? Maybe she knew it was for the best? Or maybe she didn't fully understand what had happened to her? He blinked again and focused his mind back on his sister.

"Yes, mei-mei. The pregnancy is over. If you're feeling better, I'd like to run some tests to figure out why it happened…"

River shook her head and spoke in that flat tone that was starting to worry Simon.

"Unnecessary. There's nothing wrong with the girl's body."

Simon tilted his head and stared hesitantly at her.

"I understand if you don't want to do the tests now, mei-mei, but we don't know if the Academy did anything to your body that would cause a miscarriage…"

River shook her head again.

"No. The hands of blue only touched the girl's head."

"River, we need to know what caused it…"

"The fetus went on its own."

Simon paused at that. She was a psychic, and he didn't know the extension of her abilities. Could she really know that?

"Are you sure, mei-mei?"

River nodded, that uncomfortable flatness never leaving her voice.

"The fetus wasn't a party-crasher. It knew it was uninvited, and it went away on its own."

The coldness of her statement shocked Simon, and he opened and closed his mouth several times before figuring out what to say. When the words finally came out, they were no more than a whisper.

"How… how can you say that, mei-mei? A baby should always be a blessing to its mother."

River tilted her head a little, and the strength of her gaze startled Simon.

"The girl doesn't want anything with Jayne. Jayne doesn't want anything with the girl. Jayne and the girl don't want anything together. And the fetus was Jayne and the girl together. Unwanted."

Simon stared silently at her, trying to understand the implications of her words. What kind of control could River's mind have over a pregnancy? Had River's body been able to expel the baby because her mind had rejected it? Could her mind have _provoked_ it? A shiver went down Simon's spine. Had it been a miscarriage… or an _abortion_? Simon opened his mouth, but he was cut off by River's finger over his lips.

"Shh… Let it go, Simon. It's nothing."

"Nothing? River…"

"The fetus was Jayne and River together, but now it's not anymore. Now it's gone. It turned into blood, and the blood was washed away. Now, it's nothing."

She ran a hand tenderly over her brother's worried face, then closed her eyes and went back to sleep. Simon could only stare at her, afraid of the places his mind would take him if he let it wonder. Had she really implied an abortion, or was he reading too much into her encrypted words? Could she… Simon's line of thought was interrupted by the sound of the cargo bay doors, followed by heavy boots on the metal floor. It didn't take long until Jayne's hulk form appeared at the infirmary door.

"Hey, doc. The others back yet?"

Simon tried not to stare at the man in front of him, the man who was the father of the nephew/niece Simon wasn't going to have. Jayne carried a heavy gun in his arms, holding it carefully and protectively close to his chest. He wondered if Jayne would have with his baby the same care he had with his guns. The doctor blinked at the strangeness of the thought.

"Er… No, they haven't returned yet."

Jayne nodded, then motioned to River's sleeping form, as if noticing her for the first time.

"What's wrong with the moonbrain this time?"

_While I wasn't looking, she seduced you, took advantage of your drunken state to sexually experiment with your body, got herself pregnant, then lost your baby. A baby who could have been a million of things, but now was nothing._ Simon had to bite the interior of his cheek not to blurt those words out. Jayne probably noted the weariness on the doctor's face, and raised a worried eyebrow at Simon when he took too long to answer.

"Doc? It's something serious? She alright?"

The concern in Jayne's voice threw Simon even more off balance, and he couldn't avoid the image of a lovely baby with chocolate curls and blue eyes that suddenly invaded his mind. It could have been, but now…

"It's nothing, Jayne. It's just… nothing."


End file.
